Love is in the air. With Valentine’s Day just around the corner, most couples are thinking of ways to make this day extra special. It is requiring extra imagination especially for us in Canada with a lot of businesses closed due to COVID. But how does one keep the magic of Valentine’s day going all year-round? Being married to my valentine for almost 26 years now, here are a few tips that have worked for us and would work for any couple whether in a new relationship or a seasoned one.. This is key in keeping the flame alive. It reminds you of the qualities of your partner amidst their shortfalls and helps you focus on these. It always warms my heart when I reminisce on the early days of my relationship with my husband.
Always remember why you fell in love with the person
Always be ready to forgive and ask for forgiveness. No relationship can thrive without forgiveness. We will always be an offender or the offended. Learning to forgive and ask of it, will help us resolve any conflict. Like Gary Chapman said, “Forgiveness is not a feeling; it is a commitment“.
Never ignore little things that annoy you or your partner
These seemingly innocent pet peeves can add up and cause a huge rift in your relationship if left unattended. The Bible says in Songs of Solomon 2:15; “Catch us the foxes, the little foxes that spoil the vines, for our vines have tender grapes”. Your relationship should be protected at all costs like tender vines.
Listen
It is so different from hearing. When we listen we can hear unspoken words and tend to needs before our partner presents them to us. How do you listen? Do you listen waiting for the other to finish so that you can say what you have to say? It is a whole topic in itself. But listen with interest sometimes even when the topic doesn’t necessarily interest you. If you are the attentive ear for your partner, you become their confidant and their sounding board – and vice versa for you.
Express your love and appreciation to your spouse
Never assume the other person knows how you feel about them. Don’t give each other the burden of reading each other’s minds. Tell your partner how much you love them, and what they mean to you. Avoid general and repetitive “I love yous”. Pinpoint what exactly you love about them. My husband usually tells me how much he loves me and appreciates the way I take care of the family, the sacrifices I do and how it makes our home harmonious. No one can have an overdose of love. So keep dishing it out. :). When expressing your love to them, do it in their love language (we’ll talk more of this in the next article this month).
Even though this list is not exhaustive, it’s a good tool to have in your toolbox to strengthen your relationship. For the rest of it, you will need to put your own personal touch that is unique to your couple.
Happy Valentine’s day!!
