Have you ever noticed how people have a tendency to want to change other people’s personality so that they align with “normal” people?

Growing up, I remember being scolded or corrected regarding one or two things about my personality by my mom, aunties, uncles or whoever was old enough to look at me from the top of my head. While there is nothing wrong with shaping the character and personality of a growing child, sometimes as parents or guardians we like to mould the personality of our children according to our own personality.

We need to be careful as sometimes changing one’s personality trait doesn’t necessarily produce good character. We easily label people as too talkative, pushy, or annoying but according to whom? To us, and how we perceive such personalities.

My youngest daughter can be what many would call pushy. If she wants something she won’t let go. She will look for all kinds of ways to present her case until you get her what she wants. While many would see this as a negative trait, I see it as positive in that she will grow up in life knowing what she wants and work for it until she gets it. Bear in mind as a parent, I don’t necessarily give in to all her whines and whims, but if I were to change her, she would be the opposite; complacent, not fighting for anything in life.

I found this similar character trait in the Bible in Luke 18:1-8. Jesus talks of the parable of this wicked judge who cared less for anyone or even God, but was taken down by an old widow who kept on coming to him seeking justice. This woman was seeking justice, and she wasn’t going to back down until she got it. She didn’t have money to hire a lawyer, so she went straight to the judge, and kept going day after day. The judge told himself, “even though I don’t care for God or man I will give this woman what she wants otherwise she will drive me crazy”.

This is the positive side of a pushy trait. Whatever it is you are working on go for it until you see the results. Let us encourage our children, especially girls to be authentic and proud of whom they are. To not be afraid to aim for the stars and if they miss, they might land in the moon, as sky is their limit. What personality trait are you struggling with in your kids, and how can you bring out it’s positive side?